Forty-Four Standard Memes For Every Occasion

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andcallmeshirley
Dec 18, 2019 8:08 AM EST

And in case these didn't sate your appetite for randomness, you can find another dump of funny memes here.

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  • 01
    Text - [Rehab camping trip] Drug counselor: *melting a marshmallow in a bent spoon*Okay whoooo wants s'morphines? Just kidding haha we have fun here
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 02
    Food - bler Fudge Stripes WhooPSy! Fudge Stripes Fally Fudged Cookies&Creme Keebler Fudge When you misjudge a fart. VAMTLEN PARK
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 03
    Text - Fun fact: Da Vinci drew plans for a bird long before the CIA invented them. Aulrto n ৯ dativeae
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 04
    Cartoon - boobs people ujustGan ass people PISCES feet people
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 05
    Cartoon - Basic Human Decency Punishing the bully instead of punishing the kid who's actually getting bullied and letting the bully get off easy. America's public school system
    via Reddit
  • 06
    Flamingo - DO NOT ATTEMPT TO EAT THE FORBIDDEN RHUBARB
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 07
    Chicken - iamtravellingwiththedoctor: thekrustykr4b: who needs punk rock when you can have punk cock that could have been a very different picture I am glad it wasn't
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 08
    Photo caption - When you fart real nasty and see someone coming to talk to you @oldmaster Please don't ifunny.co
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 09
    Dance - My mother telling me l can't have toy in store Grandma
    via Reddit
  • 10
    Clothing - Halloween Costume Idea: "Gradual Mutation" 1. Wear a lab coat to the party and chat about your experiments on crocodiles. 2. Every hour go to the bathroom and apply more scaly makeup. 3.Ask people for meat. 4.At the end of the night, put a lab coat on a crocodile and let it loose.
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 11
    Text - anna sarah @annasmorrill boys who r into astrology >>>> MESSAGES now benji Just checked my horoscope and it said l'm supposed to fu your ass
    via Imgur
  • 12
    Cartoon - when that day comes, everybody will love me because i will be fu ripped Imao
    via Imgur
  • 13
    Hey I just shed for the season and wanted to know if you wanted this before I ate it for nutrients. Nevermind, wrong number. Jesus christ 14 min
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 14
    Text - Please don't drink alcohol Just don't consume to0 much of it MY BLOOD IS F WINE
    via Imgur
  • 15
    Text - When your crush likes two of your memes in a row Google good places for hanaymoon cute names for babies how to be a good husband and father
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 16
    Toad - do not come any closer he will HOP he done it before he'll do it again if he HOP, what will you do then? it will be over for you you have no chance
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 17
    Hair - NO RECEIPT = NO RETURNS NO TAGS = NO RETURNS CLEARANCEDIJEWELRY/WATCHESISALE ITEMS = NO RETURNS - YES KAREN, THIS SIGN IS GOOD ENOUGH. TRY ME. - NO KAREN, WE DO NOT HAVE TO MENTION THE RETURN POLICY AT THE INITIAL SALE. OUR RETURN POLICY IS PRINTED ON THE BACK OF THE RECEIPT. THE DETAILS ARE ALSO ON THE WEBSITE. -NO KAREN, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SPEAK TO THE MANAGER. - NO KAREN, I AM NOT GOING TO CALL ANYONE FOR YOU.
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 18
    Text - Dave @DaveApnea there should be an olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like fu it, let's see how high humans can really jump 00:43 · 02/09/2019 · Twitter for iPhone ili View Tweet activity 82.3K Retweets 504K Likes
    via Imgur
  • 19
    Face - Using the scale provided, rate how much you like kids 1 2 3 4 5 B 7 8 6 9 10
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 20
    Text - Canada: CanI have lizards? Lizards: No LIZARDS
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 21
    Text - Dingo eating a shark while two snakes have sex. Welcome to Scorpio Season @chaninicholas
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 22
    Cartoon - THIS WILL HURT ME MORE THAN IT HURTS YOU,SON! PUNISH ME, DADDY! I PESERVE IT!
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 23
    Christmas tree - You on You on the outside the inside
    via Reddit
  • 24
    Text - ciryes: scope-dogg. xiaoxiaovevo: ciryes: I've heard the saying 'don't cry over spilled milk' but this is ridiculous before i read what you typed i thought you came all over the floor d up st and your own jizz decides to kinkshame you When you're jacking it to some full I made a mistake S ciryes 2,819 notes ...
    via Imgur
  • 25
    Text - pokimane @pokimanelol forever stuck between wanting to look fit and wanting to fit 5 whole pizzas in my mouth 18:14 · 21 Oct 19 · Twitter Web Client 1,591 Retweets 19.1K Likes 5 whole pizzas @Tronse_ · 3h Replying to @pokimanelol hey 27 90 1,341 36 pokimane @pokimanelol · 2h omg..
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 26
    Flyer - Replying to @chrissyteigen Can this be the non-white power one RAI 27 36 104 2,091 Your middle finger is a building in Seattle
    via Reddit
  • 27
    Adaptation - Burglar: (Breaks in my house) Me: Naked, buzzed on Busch Lights, holding a deer antler and my hunting knife. COWABUNGA IT IS
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 28
    Text - chipple @spongebobdeniro Oodbye everyon fut edibles we giving out dmt crystals this year trick or transcendence
    via Imgur
  • 29
    Face - Myth You can suck the poison out of a snake bite Fact Your mom can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 30
    Text - Her:I can't stand your face right now Me: Well you should probably sit on it so you can't see it * How to win arguments
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 31
    Cartoon - WELCOME EVERYONE To THE "MY NAME IS IN A FAMOUS SONG AND PEOPLE WONT STOP SINGING IT AT ME" SUPPORT GROUP. DOES ANYONE WANT TO SPEAK FIRST?.... ANYONE?... ANYONE? WELL,THEN HOW ABOUT YOU RRRRROOOXXXXXAAANNNE?! OH MY GOD. IT JUST SLIPPED OUT. I'M AM So00 SORRY. YEAH, COME ON EILEEN! HOW COULD you? @delberatelyburied
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 32
    Text - Hope Joan @hope_joan My boyfriend is genuinely my best friend. Not like the oh we're dating so we're forced to be friends type relationship but like the I wouldn't wanna joke around and do dumb stuff with anyone else type of thing. He's my person.
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 33
    Text - If your girl dances when she eats.. smile and let her. That's the attitude leaving her body
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 34
    Text - Those chicks in high school that no one wanted to date or talk to be looking fine asff today Meanwhile the popular bitches have 3 or 4 kids and are shaped like Sponge Bob
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 35
    Text - If a dude can cook, curve his exes, and put the toilet seat down, he probably has dead bodies buried somewhere
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 36
    Text - = CambridgeshireLive NEWS IN YOUR AREA UNITED WHAT'S ON TRAFFIC NEWS Boy, 9, so obsessed with gaming he plays for SIX hours a day Are you kidding me? That's insultingly low.
    via Reddit
  • 37
    Holy places - CAPRI SUN MY STRAW ME &DRAW TISM
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 38
    Text - a concept: me, in my cottage, in front of the wood stove, sipping tea. looking outside, my bees are pollinating my expansive garden. my goats and chickens and cows are happy and safe. i feel content with my choices and my future. i unconditionally and recklessly love myself. the local children believe i am a witch.
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 39
    Photograph - LTE A O 56% 12:53 E Black tar heroin and slutty white bitches are gifts from Jesus. - Joel Osteen
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 40
    T-shirt - I guess his other shirt, "Build the wall or l'll gargle your balls" was at the drycleaners STOMP MY FLAG ILL EAT YOUR ASS t Autrietie heican ANSKE ENDMENT
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 41
    Photo caption - THEY TOLD ME TO CLEAN MY WEAPONS SO I WASHED MY HANDS
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 42
    Guinea pig - How I sleep knowing food is hella delicious and I get to eat more of it tomorrow...
    via Dump YES (stoled)
  • 43
    Text - Donald Trump Jr. O @DonaldJ... Juarez México had 773 murders in 2017, • 1d v directly across the border, El Paso, Tx had 19, the only thing separating them is a wall. Because wall work!!! 3,347 LI 14.2K O 50.2K Howard Gabert @HowardGabert Replying to @DonaldJTrumpJr Detroit had 267 murders in 2017; directly across the border, Windsor Canada had 3. The only thing separating them is a rive. and gun control... and a properly funded school system, universal health care, 12 months of paid pare
    via Reddit
  • 44
    Text - prodigy af @ProdigyNelson Her: when you said "magical in bed" this isn't exactly what I was exp- Me: *holds up 8 of hearts* is this your card Her: *softly* holy sit
    via Imgur

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